Local husband plans sensible spending for tax refund

Almost as sensible as a homemade hot-air balloon.

It’s that wonderful time of year again—tax time. Filing returns can be stressful, but many anticipate receiving their return. While some folks might be making foolish decisions about how to spend their returns, local husband Danny Wilson is planning to make wiser decisions this year with his tax return.

“I’ve done a lot of thinking, and I’m pretty sure my list of investments will brilliantly prepare my family for our future. I’m making these investments purely in the interests of my wife and three children. They’ll surely thank me come April.”

Mr. Wilson’s investments:

- 1,000 lottery tickets. “Obvious go-to investment. Highly likely to pay off.”
- A complete 1987 Topps baseball card set. “They’re coming back, and I’ll be ready.”
- 3 cases of mango Smirnoff Ice. “Bring it fellas.”
- 144 rolls of paper towels. “I’m not sure how I’ll get them home, but they never go bad, right?”
- 87" 3D television. “Great resale value. The kids will love the free Spongebob DVD.”
- Electric bass (no amp). “I’ll get the amp next year.”

“Who knows. Maybe I’ll get some dumb stuff too.”

Any other suggestions for Mr. Wilson?