Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Local karaoke sensation thinks he might be terrible

Every Wednesday night for the past five years, you would have been able to catch Richard Jones, a.k.a. “Mr. Jobangles,” signing karaoke at the Dew Drop Inn. But tonight, it’s a different story.

“I used to think the other patrons loved me. I thought the other folks in the bar on Wednesdays were just whistling because they were trying to get a friend’s attention, or that they were booing because they didn’t like the people who were whistling. Or maybe they were getting up and leaving because they had an appointment. I dunno. I know I’m not perfect, but who doesn’t want to hear ‘Tie a Yellow Ribbon ‘Round the Old Oak Tree’?

“But last week really stunned me. A guy at the end of the bar started shaking while I was singing an encore of Robert Goulet’s “What Now My Love,” and then he threw his car keys at me. I thought he just wanted me to give him a ride home, so I was like, ‘maybe next week, Billy Ocean.’

“Then he threw his beer at me, and I said, ‘no thanks, I’ve already got a drink.’ But then he started screaming, and his head just exploded. There was blood everywhere. I made it through the song, but I was shocked.

“I don’t know for sure, but I think I heard the DJ say, ‘alright, let’s give a hand to Mr. Jobangles, the worst karaoke singer in the history of mankind.’

“I don’t think I should go back this week. I may not be as good as I thought I was.”

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