MLS commissioner Don Garber could barely contain himself this evening when he announced the latest expansion site for Major League Soccer: Timmy Wilson’s backyard.“We think that between the fence on three sides of the playing surface, the skybox view from the tree house, and Mrs. Wilson’s cookies and lemonade, Timmy’s backyard will be a premier location for our next expansion club.
“The sight lines from the back porch are pretty great, and we believe goalkeepers will appreciate the shadows cast by the overhanging oaks. We really think the fans and the players will enjoy the intimacy of the new field. Play ball!”
Critics, however, are not as enthusiastic. They claim that a lack of diversity in the neighborhood, low local tax revenues, and poor public transportation access will likely spell eventual doom for the new location.
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